Over the weekend I watched a friend of a friend hit on this guy. When the guy didn’t respond favorably toward his advances he returned to us, and began to make some very disparaging comments about this guy. His intentions were to detract from his bruised inflated ego by speaking negatively about the person who had rejected him. I actually see this all the time with gays.
Coming into this lifestyle I would have never guessed we were part of the oppressed. The majority of the gays I’ve come in contact with have some of the highest self esteems this side of the Mississippi. And apparently no real friends to mirror to them the type of person they truly are, flaws and all.
My people, you may choose to believe no one hits on you because you’re too attractive but maybe it’s because you walk around all grand like the world owes you something. I know you think it’s because your intelligence is disarming and guys aren’t on your level but perhaps its because you come off as a know-it-all and intolerant of others who have taken a different path in life.
You may tell your friends its because of your designer clothes, your hot body, or because you’re put together to well but I’m convinced its possibly because you act like a snob and your arrogance is a turn off. Frankly, as much as you may think you walk on water everybody is not into you. Take the time to self reflect, so that you may recognize what is off putting to others and stop making excuses. Make those necessary changes instead of reveling in delusions of grandeur.
Some of us need a dose of humility, a slice of humble pie and a shot of reality to wash it all down. You’ll never advance in life if you keep blaming your short comings on others. In addition please also know that everyone is not “Hating” on you. I’m not sure what its origins are but “Hating” has become a term we use to dismiss criticism by pointing the finger at someone else. It results in you missing the opportunity to learn and improve yourself. In the end, I say all this to say maybe he’s just not that into you, and maybe you need to get over yourself.
Some of us need a dose of humility, a slice of humble pie and a shot of reality to wash it all down. You’ll never advance in life if you keep blaming your short comings on others. In addition please also know that everyone is not “Hating” on you. I’m not sure what its origins are but “Hating” has become a term we use to dismiss criticism by pointing the finger at someone else. It results in you missing the opportunity to learn and improve yourself. In the end, I say all this to say maybe he’s just not that into you, and maybe you need to get over yourself.
7 COMMENTS:
this post is on point. the only part i disagree with is that their self esteem is HIGH... it's actually quite low. if you are secure about yourself, you can accept rejection without taking it personally. to dog the person out b/c they've rejected you speaks volumes about your self esteem (or lack thereof).
good post!
In total agreement with the above comment (gee). If more people would work on their insides as much as their outward appearance then perhaps you would find more people in relationships and not just hooking up.
It isn't high self esteem at all. It is insecurity masquerading as self worth.
I'm that snobby holier than thou guy at the bar.
I secretly like being objectified but won't go as far as actually returning a compliment since I'm convinced its beneath me.
That doesn't mean I won't drink the vodka tonic you bought me however.
Well, I didn't say it...
Lol, this was a very good post. And I think quite a few of us needed to 'hear' it.
Amen! I certain that everyone of us at some point or other has had that grandiose attitude, be it our college education/degree(s), designer pieces, the right address, what we drive or how we may or may not look. It seems to be part of the gay culture for some odd reason or other, and it gets shadier with time.
lol for someone new into the scene, this was very informative.
I guess I'll have to make sure this is never me!!
Loved it
Please post this as a thread on bgc.. 90% of the dudes on there need a dose of reality!!
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