The B.I.B.L.E

EDITOR | CHIEF TOY COUTURE




I have a loose friend. I’ll call him Lucy. Recently while he, I and a group of friends where out he asked if anybody knew of a way he could keep his ass hole tight. And with that one question came an hour discussion. He got all kinds of advice. Someone said douche with vinegar, another person said soak in a hot sea salt bath, another friend said ‘work out more and increase your squats‘..Someone else said clench your butt cheeks through out the day. Another person said something about a product called China Star shrink cream. I heard so many odd remedies I was all of sure someone would soon say ‘Brusell sprouts & ketchup!” or “Grated Parmesan Cheese”

If someone were looking at us from a distance they would have thought we were trying to crack the Da Vinci Code. By the end of the conversation he looked even more confused so I know he didn‘t take anything away from the convo……I find the answer to be quite simple: STOP JUMPING ON EVERY BIG DICK YOU SEE…or perhaps give your ass a Spring Break.

Read the B.I.B.L.E - Bottom’s Instructions Before Letting Enter :

Pick, Choose, & Refuse….. instead of…… Dick, Booze, & Abuse

30 COMMENTS:

Cogent Ascending said...

Omg my copy of the B.I.B.L.E is all tattered and dog eared. My first patron was kind enough to bestow his copy upon me. And tell Lucy the myth about your butt hole being made of muscle and able to retighten w time is a bunch of shit. If you stretch or damage the muscle tissue too often the scar tissue will eventually prevent it from ever tightening back up to a pre-slut age.

Curious said...

Damn, I think I've been with Lucy.

Phunk Factor said...

'Cogent Ascending' has put it very precisely...too much effig does the ass no good!!

Still a 'spring break' maybe something worth considering!!

Gorgeous_Puddin said...

Bwhahahahahahaha! You crack me the hell up everytime I stop by here you nut!!!! LOL! Some of those remedies sound like how to keep a vajayjay tight! I know for certain the tighting really does work on the vajayjay!! It's called Kegals.

THUNDERCAT said...

let me get this out of the way...

DID ANYONE ELSE SEE THE ASS ON THAT GUY IN THE PICUTRE? OMG I WANNA BITE THE FUCK OUT OF THAT DAMN THING TILL MY TEETH TOUCH!!!

AAAH-hemmm...*clears throat*

now with that out of the way...

Those home remedies work on pussy unfortunatly...trust me--and I say this from experience...

THE ASS HOLE DON'T SNAP BACK AS FAST! It takes time...maybe around a month or so to snap back to ALMOST NORMAL...

Tell lucy to do what I do.. here is MY rule,...

YOU CAN ONLY GO FORWARD...NEVER BACKWARDS! What I mean by that is if you get with a guy with a small dick one month...then a guy with an average cock the next...you CANT go back to small cocks, you feel me?

you can only go UP! and stay way from mandingo monster cocks...you'll end up with a Cinderella complex...If they cant fit the "dirty glass slipper"...then they cant get to the ball!

jamari fox said...

This is why I keep my booty like a VIP. Not everyone can get between the ropes. It kills me how people just let every dude get up and inside their shit... and then running to the bathroom because they can't hold their shit.

Keep it nice and tight fellas. When the right dude comes along and he can't be satisfied because he can fall right in.

... he will fall right on out.

Twisted Wing said...

TOY ... u never cease to amaze. I love to read ur insights and observations (was that redundant ...hmm... ne-way:)

and in regards to getting tight, again,.... yes there are tricks... but some people are just tighter than others. Pick up an anatomy book, the anal cavity is lined with muscle-- some of us just have better MUSCLE CONTROL.. *que the house music...lol

TOY, you and Jamari are right, if u let everybody into your house, those walls will come tumbling down... Practice some restraint, these metros are way too small- if not for your a$$, do it for your REP....

Confessions Of A City Girl said...

Lol! I'm done with you!
"Pick, Choose, & Refuse….. instead of…… Dick, Booze, & Abuse"
You are a mess! But you know what's so funny, a friend of mine called me with the same issue. She said "My vagina might be getting a little loose"... The good firend that i am, i didnt say anything but "more kegals?"
The other half of me wanted to say "Hoe (offense intended) stop f*ckin everything that says you're pretty, then maybe your cooche wouldn't be ready to fall out from between you legs... it's confused!"
*SIGH* But i refrained...

Lol Sidenote: Why is my verification code "Masta"... I dont know how i feel about this :-/

-Sherine
sherinethegirl.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

Just how much sex are these guys having? My ass stays tight even with a daily fucking LOL.

The Empress said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog. I always love discovering new readers and their blogs. I'm with Falen re: how effing hot that dude's ass is along with some of the other photos as well. Great posts here and I look forward to reading more!
Have a fantabulous weekend,
The Empress

http://rantersbox.blogspot.com

Chet said...

The house has no walls! How very thoughtful of all of you to give the brotha advice on how he could tighten or put a grip on that hollow hole.

First and foremost he should see a doctor about it, then as you stated "stop jumping on every big dick he sees." I doubt if there is actually a remedy that would tighten an abused asshole. Then again over time maybe just maybe it will tighten back up.

I agree and like the B.I.B.L.E. (Bottom's Instructions Before Letting Enter). Pick, Choose and Refuse instead of Dick, Booze and Abuse.

Thirty3 Naked Laydies said...

For once, we are at a total loss for words. TC- I need to get you your TV show. I would have PAID to have been at that table... or to have been that more than frequent waiter -- topping-up your glasses.

S.I.F. said...

WOW! So not what I was expecting to stumble into... HA!

Will Burke said...

Call this an unconfirmed rumor, but I heard that there's a yoga technique that involves clenching your O-Ring to improve your mood. Your punch line was perfect!

Todd HellsKitchen said...

Wow... Learn something new every day!!

Annie (Lady M) x said...

There is only one option. Every time you are stood at the bus-stop waiting for a bus (or other hang aroundery places), you should clench your buttocks, and then breath up from the back. You will feel a contraction. Do it a thousand times and voila! Pert-bum city!

P.S. I have no scientific evidence to back this up.

Anonymous said...

hahaha you are very witty. love it.

Eduardo Guize said...

From now on, I'm a B.I.B.L.E.-thumping person.

This post is GOLD!

Roger Poladopoulos said...

You are so right, my friend! Great blog!

Bruno Laliberté said...

while i enjoy how you concluded this post, i must say: douching with vinegar?? what a terrible idea!! this would cause damage to your bowels, the kind you don't want. might even get an infection, and it makes the tissues raw, even more vulnerable to diseases... terrible idea...
:/~
HUGZ

Rana said...

Couldn't have said it better myself... Love it!

Anonymous said...

This is why I'm a top. :-) Good advice for the bottom.

Sloane said...

Thanks to visit my Blog and leave a nice comment...
Your Blog is Hot and funny, I love it!!!
Keep doing the good work Buddy.. ^_^
Sloane

Jimmy De La Cruz said...

Toy!!!!!

This is Jimmy. Follow me on twitter @jimmydelastyle or shoot me an e-mail, we need to talk.

Corve DaCosta said...

interesting conversation .....keep to himself for a while

BosGuy said...

Thanks - your post caught me off guard and had me laughing out loud.

Poetry of the Day said...

kagels work for ladies, but im not sure of the butt

raulito said...

I think that getting fist-fucked all the way to the elbow doesn't help much either.

Or sitting on one of those traffic cones...lol

saludos,
raulito

Professor Locs said...

Very sage advice....lol I am glad to see you are writing and posting again. Keep writing!

www.professorlocs.com

Sam In Real Life said...

HAHA! I've been away so long that I completely forgot why I loved this blog!

Being picky isn't a challange, ruptured piles is!

Just saiyan

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